Apparently I'm just never here. I've been trying to write again lately, especially now that school is out for a couple of weeks. This summer I'm taking organic chemistry, so I'm a little nervous. Everyone keeps saying that organic chemistry is the make or break class for bio majors of any sort. I wish they would just keep their mouths shut. I have a very high GPA that I would like to keep that way.

Anyway, I haven't been working on any fan fictions lately, which used to be all that I ever wrote. I've started a couple of different futuristic stories, but none of it is anything that I've become interested enough in to continue. Even when I do keep working on it, I'm usually terrified to post it anywhere. When other people read my work, it feels a bit like a violation of my privacy or something. Fan fictions are safe because they are just extensions of someone else's work. I don't feel so exposed.

I still can't take criticism, though. I'll usually stop writing or posting something when I get a particularly harsh criticism or if I never hear anything back at all. Looking at that behavior objectively (which is difficult), I'd probably classify it as spineless.

I have a wind burn on my cheek from riding horses in the mountains. It hurts like you would not believe. I hope it doesn't scar or something. The dermatologist keeps reassuring me that it will heal on its own, but I've had it for about three days and it looks the same as it did the day it happened. We won't analyze that little fear. I figure I've done enough pop psychology on myself for this journal entry. I can save the revelation of my deepest fears for our next session, thanks. And no, it isn't my mother's fault or whatever else people generally blame.

I just back from vacation (in the mountains, obviously) and I'm still suffering from jet-lag, I guess. I hate airplanes, particularly when I am trapped on them with small, screaming children. Little monsters. I think that I'm afraid of them. It was much colder up there, and coming back home has been almost painful. The heat nearly knocked me down when I stepped off of the airplane. It's funny how quickly we get used to cooler weather.

I think I'll go ride my horse. It might make me feel better, and I missed him while I was gone. I'll probably be sorry I did when I'm outside sweating profusely, but it's good to suffer for love, right?